Introduction: Fart Harvesting 101
I recently caught my 4 year old nephew attempting to fart into a jar in the hopes of saving it for later to "surprise" Grandpa.
This is not the first time I have encountered a little boy with a dream of bottling his own farts. Years ago my younger cousin, lets call him "J", had a whole shelf of dated mason jars in their barn. He was very proud of his collection.
I remember a few kids I babysat had similar aspirations, not to mention that I also once overheard my boss in the next room talking about the same thing.
It drives me nuts! Not that they are attempting to bottle their farts, I think farting is hilarious, but that they attempt to collect the farts in a very crude and inefficient manner.
I am writing this Instructable in the hopes that it will inspire fart bottlers everywhere to improve their technique.
This technique, while simple, does require a body of water.
Equipment
You will need a receptacle. A sealable transparent wide mouthed jar or bottle should do the trick.
(A funnel will come in handy if you are using a narrow mouthed bottle).
A body of water. A bathtub will work well for this, though it could be done in a swimming pool or natural body of water, like a river, lake, or ocean.
Technique (Receptacle Prep)
- Lower a jar into the water
- Let it fill completely with water
- Flip the jar upside down, keeping the mouth of the jar below the water level. (As long as the mouth of the jar remains below water level, the water should not drain out of the jar.)
Step 1: Filling the Receptacle
The goal is to fart under water and catch the fart bubbles in the upside-down jar. The farts should rise into the jar and displace the water.
I'll let you figure out what is the best, and most likely awkward, position for you to achieve this. It might also be easiest to do this without clothes blocking the path of the gas into your jar.
Step 2: Finishing Up
Don't worry if you don't fill the whole jar in one session, you can continue to fill it later.
While the mouth of the jar is still under water, screw on the lid, remove the bottle from the water and towel dry it. You can also store the jar upside down.
Congratulations! What is not water in your jar should be pure unadulterated fart!
(If you want to continue filling the jar later, just make sure to place the jar upside down with the mouth of the jar under water before unscrewing and continuing to fill.)
Participated in the
Brave the Elements 2016
9 Comments
2 years ago
Never would have thought of this! Great job!
Tip 4 years ago
A way to step it up could be to create a valve on a bottle, and link it to a pump that could compress the fart into a sealed container. As you would pump the fart to the sealed container, you would see the water filling the bottle/jar again, and you would know when to stop pumping. A suggestion to pump the most air into the container without pumping any water would be to use a very narrow tube with a reverse funnel to guide your farts towards it. The narrower the tube, the bigger the distance between the water and the pump's intake, to the easiest it is to avoid pumping too much.
That way, you could easily keep accumulating and compressing farts, and they would be ready for release at a later time. I can think of many good design suggestions. Since farts are not very voluminous, I suggest eliminating as much dead space as possible in the design. For example, the container could be placed directly against the end of the tube with a one way valve. Maybe at first it could even be put under vacuum so it wouldn't be filled with normal air. An other way would be to make a container that has as close to zero volume at first, but that would expend as it gets filled with farts. Passed a certain point, the container wouldn't expand any more, and the pressure inside would start building up. The easiest starting point for that would be to use a syringe. Suck the fart into the syringe, then transfer it to something else.
Fart purity is important. Think of all the awesome things you could do with pressurized farts!
Reply 4 years ago
This is what I later came up with to the delight of my nephew. It works! We even got a beautiful blue flame when we lit the gas on fire as it was exiting the "fart pod". I really would like to fill a bubble with pure fart and then light them on fire. That is the next step. You are right, it would be nice to pressurize them. These little fart pods don't hold much volume.
Reply 4 years ago
OMG, this is golden! I was thinking of making a contraption similar to that when I found your Instructable. My basic idea was: "Would it be possible to carbonize water or soda with farts?" After much research I have decided not to carbonize beverages with farts. But it would be hilarious to pressurize various containers with farts so that they blow in people's faces when they open them.
Reply 4 years ago
Hahaha! That would be hilarious! :D
6 years ago
this could so work. now let's say you are in your tub and have a few practice farts, (just follow the body up and around). then you can probably judge the direction.
6 years ago
This gives your profile image a totally different perspective.
Reply 6 years ago
OH MY!!! IT TOTALLY DOES!!! I guess I should have thought that through a little more. :D
6 years ago
ahahahahahaha.... :D